Children’s Problems (Successful Family Upbringing Series-05)

Difference Between Advising And Shaming by Ibn Rajab Al Hanbali In this monumental works of the great shaikh Ibn Rajab Al Hanbali, the author provides essentail deatil in discussing key points dealing with differences that arise between the Prople of Sunnah, and the manners and etiruette one should acquire when differing occurs. He beautifully illustrates the difference betweeen advising that is encouraged, and shaming that is not permitted. The difference between sincere advising and shaming Ibn Rajab al-Haafidh Ibn Rajab al-Hanbali, in his monograph al-Farq bain al-Naseehah w’al-Ta’eer, devotes one section to the topic of “On the Difference between advising about one’s short-comings in order to return from that, and rebuking and scolding for one’s sins.” It reads as follows: And from this is that one would tell a man something that he disliked to his face, and if that was with the purpose of sincerely advising him, then that is good. And one of the Salaf said to his brother, “Do not advise me until you can say something to my face which I dislike. “And the salaf disliked to command good and forbid evil in this way [i.e. with shaming and re-probation], and they loved to be discrete about what went on between the enjoiner of good and the one being enjoined, for verily this is one of the signs of sincere advising. For verily it is not the purpose of the sincere adviser to broadcast the short-coming of the one whom he is advising, and verily his purpose is only to remove the corruption which has occurred in him. And as for broadcasting and manifesting the short-coming, then this is part of what Allah and His Messenger have forbidden. Allah the Exalted said: Indeed, those who like that immorality should be publicized among those who have believed will have a painful punishment in this world and the Hereafter. And Allah knows and you do not know. And if it had not been for the favor of Allah upon you and His mercy…

This is an exquisite collection of incidents from the life of the Prophet (S), stories from our Islamic Heritage, and thought-provoking anecdotes from the life of the author. The aim of the book is to train the reader to enjoy living his life by practicing various self-development and inter-personal skills. What is so compelling and inspiring about this book is that, in order to highlight the benefit of using social skills, the author draws from the lives of the Prophet (S) and his Companions. This book is both a practical systematic guide to self-improvement and a treasure trove of historical incidents. It increases self-awareness, whilst nurturing the soul and strengthening the spirit. The books author is a prominent figure in the field of Islamic Dawah and has authored more than twenty published works.

Life at the peaceful fishing hamlet of Tobay has been changed beyond recognition by the power-hungry Abbas, who uses threats and violence to fulfill his desire for control. Will the villagers’ faith, courage, and wisdom be enough to win the battle and save their way of life?

Everyone chases after happiness, yet few fully recognize what it is or whence it comes from. Happiness isn’t a destination but a journey needing certain inner qualities and a right state of mind to experience and reap. It’s neither sold as a commodity nor can be bought, except through carefully crafting one’s character and following a plan of action.

For indeed, those who don’t plan will fail to realize desired results. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings be upon him) said, “Those among us (destined to be) from people of happiness [in the Hereafter] will (find it easy to) enact deeds of people of happiness…” [Sahih Al-Bukhari, #4948].

In other words, by choosing a path reflecting attitudes of happy people one will recognize its reality and the ease and pleasantry in having good deeds done that are in themselves, characteristics of happy people. It requires contemplation of an alternate world view to one that compounds first world problems, for example.

Shaykh Nasir Al-Sa’di mentions in this short summary, eight ways to achieving the goal of bringing about happiness while driving away its opposites – sadness, grief, and anxiety. Reaching it is contingent on three main causes he identifies to leading a goodly life.

These succinct pointers are easy to understand and you’ll be able to identify the impediments you need to rework and hence live your life with happiness. This will transform you into being the best Muslim you can in today’s complex world, and will also inspire you to train your inner self.

Whoever follows these eight steps will find self-awareness and a pathway to joy and success in this life and the next, Insha’Allah.